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Saturday, 3 October 2009

The Vampire Is Just Not That Into You (by Vlad Mezrich)

by Vlad Mezrich
Release date : October 1, 2009
Are you in love with a vampire? Are you worried that you might not be his (blood) type? Do you wonder whether that cold stare means he isn’t interested . . . or if it’s because he’s been dead for three centuries (nothing personal)? Have you tried to coax him out of his crypt with a flash of your neck or a near-death situation that requires him to save you at the very last possible moment? Have you ever considered what it will be like to introduce him to your mother? Even though your vampire’s skin is transfixingly translucent, he can still be very hard to read. Sometimes he’s simply holding back his true feelings, resisting the urge to bite you in the chance that one day you will truly love him. And other times . . . well, he’s just not that into you. How can you tell? Undead dating specialist Vlad Mezrich has all the answers, utilizing quizzes, Top Ten lists, language analysis, real-life (and real-death) testimonials, and fancy charts to show you what you need to do in order to get your vampire and keep him forever. Once you go vamp, you never decamp – so let this eternally rewarding book show you the way to the vampire of your dreams. (summary taken from back cover)
MY THOUGHTS : This book actually made me laugh out loud, and that doesn't happen on a daily basis (when reading). I'm not a big vampire fan (shame, shame, I know !), but I get to read many vampire books. I do take them seriously, but I admit this book really became my favourite vampire-related read. Because it was fun, silly, light, clever, entertaining, and even educational. Yes, you read that right. There are many references to films, books and legends about vampires, and I think I may have learnt a thing or two (between two giggles).

But that's not the main goal of this book. This guide is dedicated to us, poor Mortals. This guide helps us understanding vampires, from the way they use Facebook to the way they look. This guide will give you all the tips you need to find yourself a hot vampire (hot as in sexy, obviously), to succeed in keeping him, and also to protect yourself (both morally and physically). Vlad, our helpful vampire and relationship-specialist, knows when to joke and when to be serious (dating a vampire IS serious business). I loved his advices, the quizzes, the lists and the statistic charts. They're really well-made and fun and turn this book into an interactive read, almost like a magazine.

I definitely recommend this book, vampire fans will have a great time reading it and it's the kind of book you can read a hundred times and never get bored with. I sincerely hope they'll do the same thing with other creatures (werewolves, faeries, etc.), that would be fab !

Here is the kind of things you'll encounter :
Quizzes : « Are You Ready To Introduce Him to Your Family ? », « Is He Tired Of You ? »
Testimonies : “I’m into a girl who doesn’t leave the lid up after she goes to the casket”. Glen, age 194.
“Who goes to get a drink from a cow and comes back with milk ? I will never understand humans”. Lemuel, age 203.
Image : (I took it from Amazon)
(illustration from The Vampire Is Just Not That Into You, copyright 2009)


  1. I want that illustration on a poster. Priceless.

  2. That sounds so good to read. Thanx for the review.

  3. ParaJunkee : It is !
    Misty : Haha ! I'm looking forward to seeing the same illustration for werewolves.
    Nina : It really is a light and fun read. And you're welcome !

  4. I love the sound of this book! It looks really funny! I need to check this out! Great review!

    WV: bappen


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